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We know what bullying is. It’s repeated aggression, verbal, psychological or physical behaviour by an individual or group against others. It’s always wrong and it should never be overlooked or ignored.

Cyberbullying is the same, yet slightly different, and, some would argue, more dangerous. Cyberbullies use the internet, mobile phones and other technologies to inflict psychological harm on their targets.

Cyberbullying can take so many different forms. Sending mean or threatening messages, emails, photos or video clips, posting nasty messages to social networking sites, message boards, or chat rooms, setting up fake profiles to say bad things about someone or accessing someone’s account repeatedly to make trouble for them are all part of what constitutes bullying online.

The main differences between bullying and cyberbullying are that online, the communication between young people is usually hidden from adults, making it difficult to detect and deal with.

What can I do if my Child is Being Bullied Online?

Parents know their children better than anyone. It means you are best placed to identify and deal with any cyberbullying they may encounter.

There are some tell-tale signs associated with cyberbullying which you can be on the look-out for.

If your child is avoiding school, or seems upset, sad or angry when or after using their phone or PC, it may be a sign of cyberbullying.

If your child begins shunning the computer or becomes disinterested with technology, it could also be a sign, as is the rapid switching of screens when you enter the room.

As a parent, you must also confirm that you are dealing with bullying behaviour. Ask yourself the following four questions:

  1. Is your child specifically targeted on their own or is the behaviour targeted at a group of people?
  2. Has this been happening over a period of time?
  3. Is the behaviour part of a recurring pattern?
  4. And, is the behaviour deliberately intended to harm or upset your child?
Once you have confirmed that bullying is taking place, you should get in touch with your child’s school or youth organisation. Internet Service Providers should also be contacted and, if the cyberbullying is very serious, or potentially criminal, you should contact your local gardaí.

Encouraging your child to talk to you about cyberbullying is key to maintaining an open and positive environment which can help you deal with the situation. Responding negatively by barring internet use or a mobile phone can cause a lot of damage and will also put you out of the loop if cyberbullying happens again.

  What Advice Should I Give my Child?


Start by commending your child for coming to speak to you about the problem.

Then, give them the following advice:

  • Don't Reply: Young people should never reply to messages that harass or annoy them. The bully wants to know they have upset their target. If they get a response it feeds into the problem and makes things worse
  • Keep the Messages: By keeping nasty messages your child will be able to produce a record of the bullying, the dates and the times. This will be useful for any subsequent school or garda investigation
  • Block the Sender: No one needs to put up with someone harassing them. Whether it’s mobile phones, social networking or chat rooms, children can block contacts through service providers
  • Report Problems: Ensure your child reports any instances of cyberbullying to websites or service providers. Sites like Facebook have reporting tools. By using these, your child will be passing important information to people who can help eradicate cyberbullying
 
Preventing Cyberbullying:

As a parent, you can create a positive and supportive atmosphere for your child regarding bullying. Often, children are afraid to report it because they fear the bullying will escalate.

But by building awareness and being open with your child, they will feel empowered to talk to you about cyberbullying instead of hiding it away from you.

You should also get to grips with your child’s internet and phone use. Encourage your son or daughter to show you the websites they use. It will give you the knowledge to make it easier to make the right decisions as challenges arise.

Encouraging good ‘netiquette’, an informal code of conduct for behaving online, is also a good idea. Netiquette includes using correct language online, being polite and not copying other people's work, as well as complying with copyright laws surrounding music, video and image files.

Mobile operators provide a ‘dual access’ service, which can be a really good tool too. It allows you to access you child’s mobile phone account records like numbers called, account balances etc. Contact your mobile phone provider for more information.

Key Advice for Children:       
  •          Don’t Reply to messages that harass or annoy you.

  •          Keep the Message: You don't have to read it, but keep it. Website owners, mobile phone companies and the Gardaí will all look for evidence before they will be able to take any action to help you.

  •          Block the Sender: You don’t need to put up with someone harassing you.

  •          Tell Someone you trust Talking to your parents, friends, or someone you trust is usually the first step in dealing with any issue. In the case of school related bullying messages you should also talk to a teacher you trust.

  •          Report Problems to the people who can do something about it. You can take control, by not putting up with offensive content by reporting it when you come across it.

Scoil Chaitríona Cappamore 061 381774                                                    capcon.ias@eircom.net